Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover

In Somalia young men are searching for the ideal ‘good wife’. It’s not based on who you are exactly, what makes you who you are; it’s based on your faith. And how do you tell if a woman is religious or not? For these young men the critieria is that they are wearing the hijab. If it’s the niqab, then it’s even better! Then they can go showing off to their relatives that they have picked such a good catch, all just because she’s wearing the hijab.

I remember my 18 year old cousin was happy to announce that he wants to get engaged. All he told us about the girl is that she is wearing the hijab qurux badan. I mean, what more do we want? That’s enough! That just proves she’s an excellent girl, a perfect muslimah.yaab dheh.

On the other side of the coin there are sisters who are looking for the ideal husband. These sisters choose the guy on the basis of their looks; do they look Islamic- are they wearing a beard? Do they talk a lot about Islam? Do they preach? masajidka ma aadaan Even better!

It’s when they get married to each other that they realise it was all wrong. Appearance doesn’t mean a thing ladies and gentlemen. What’s inside is what really counts, the outside is a bonus if what’s inside reflects what is on the outside. The divorce rate is increasing because of this issue. It’s devastating lives.

I remember a sister was very attracted to a young man because all he spoke about was dawah and religion. She married him and he ended up being a terrorist suspect and jailed for several years. He left her with nothing because he was poor. The flat they lived in had no electricity, imagine? He believed being poor was Islamic. His twisted version of Islam made him think that it was good to live in a hut dhooqo ah, it was good to not have a stable job, it was good to use others for his own benefit and take advantage of them, it was good to hurt others as long as he justified his reasons. It was good to struggle. I have no idea what happened to this sister, but I do pray for her, aamiin.

I remember hearing a story of a guy in Nairobi, Kenya who wanted to get married to a very beautiful girl who wore the hijab. Her wearing the hijab was enough for him to determine that she was a religious girl. He didn’t bother to get to know her through the engagement period because he was so confident that she was the right girl for him. He later found out that she was in love with another guy and seeing him behind his back. He broke off the engagement and vowed to get to know the person he would marry- in an Islamic setting of course.sax waryaa dee.

But too many of our sisters and brothers are falling into the same trap. I hear of brothers saying they are looking for a ‘hijabi girl to marry’. Or sisters saying they are looking for ‘bearded brothers oo gar dheer leh to marry’. A few months ago I came across a blog of a brother who writes a lot about Islam. A sister who was new to the blog wrote a comment saying ‘You sound like a very good husband’. How did she know that? Just based on the fact that he wrote about Islam a lot? This is just an example and in no way is it judging these people. But divorces are increasing because of this reason- that people just look at the exterior and later find out the interior is a devil in disguise. aah ilaahoow iga celi kuwaas aamiin

So sisters, brothers, daughters, sons, don’t judge a person ENTIRELY by its cover. It’s doomed many. Hubsiimo hal baa la siistaa ee is jira walaalayaal. Somali ceelna uma qodna cidna uma maqana marka waa inaan iska ilaalinaa inaan godka cidlada ah aan ku dhacno